The Just-Don't-Get-It's....

What can I say? These men here....just...don't...get it! No matter how much you lay out it, spell it out...sound it out - they just don't get it. They will never get it. These types, unfortunately, you'll have no other choice than to just drop and ignore, because they refuse to understand you. Period.

Example:
Man and woman go out - once, or a few times. Whatever. For some reason, the two just don't mesh, and things aren't flowing, but the guy is still very interested. In spite of the fact that the conversation sucks. In spite of the fact that the woman has an obvious appearance of boredom or nuisance. He is still interested, so, the woman decides she needs to let him know that it's not working. He doesn't "understand" - they seem to be getting along really well. She says "thank you for the lovely evening, but I'm ready to go home". He wants to know why, and if they can hang out for a little while longer. She says she's tired. He says "but tomorrow's Sunday, and you can sleep in". She gets a little annoyed and gets bolder and says, "_____, I'm really not into you. This isn't working for me. We have no chemistry". He says "Why not? I feel a good vibe between us!!" She says, "Maybe we can be friends" (uh-huh! The "Friend" tactic). He says "OK, any way to be closer to you. Can I see you tomorrow?" She says, "No. I'll call you." He takes her home, she gets out the car, he gets out, too, and asks "Can I come in?" She says, "No, I'm tired" (still trying to be nice). He says "I just need to use the bathroom" or "Can I use your phone, my cell phone is dead". She's forced to get firm and mean. He still is nice and doesn't get it.

Can you see where I'm going with this?

I've interacted with a few men who were like this, and must note, that even being firmer and telling them there is no vibe doesn't work. I went out with a guy once, for the first time, and the next day tried to explain to him that I had a good time, but don't think we should go out again. I wasn't feeling him, and we had no connection. I tried to put it tactfully, but he just refused to get it. He asked me why I went out with him. I tried to explain that I had HOPES that we'd have a connection (we didn't - he weirded me out during the date with some real awkward behavior). He still didn't get it. He asked me why I told him I had a good time. I told him that I DID, just not enough to warrant a second date (true). He didn't get it. He said I was being fake. HUH? So, I'm supposed to CONTINUE going out with him because HE wants to, even though I don't? I could not seem to get him to understand that I went out with him HOPING that because we both initially found the other attractive, that there would be chemistry. There wasn't. So instead of leading him on, I told him where I stood. He didn't get it, and because he couldn't understand - or refused to - he in turn cussed me out. I wished him all the best, and told him to never contact me again.

This is definitely a Just-don't-get-it Guy.

Every person - man or woman - should be gifted with God-given common sense, that says, if a person seems or is giving off a clear vibe, either through words or actions, that they are not interested in you....chances are, they really aren't. And IF, said person has the "balls" enough to clearly say so, then they likely mean it. I have yet to meet a person that would say "I'm not really into you" when they really are. There are few things more frustrating than trying to explain or express a feeling to someone who just won't get it. When they have this perfect scenario stuck in their mind about how they think things should be and how they think you should feel, your opinion or feelings will not make sense if they aren't the same. The men who don't get this, are the Just-Don't-Get-It's, and sadly, until they have NO CHOICE but to get it, they WILL NOT.

Write an email and save your breath, because it won't matter either way.

They just won't get it.